light of the sun, as we drove over the hill that brings it into full view. Em and I, not in sullen silence as at other times; but, in the maternal banter that comes with the season of the predawn of womanhood. "71 on a paper? Are you going to take that Em? Are you going to...?" She didn't say shut up; but I know that my days of this banter is very limited and I am pushing it, with her. But, what a challenge she has been through childhood.
Like the waves of the ocean, where we came from on Long Island and not at all, like the placid reservior, where we are now, is the spirit of my freshly budding Emily. Womanhood has so much promise for her, if she can see it.
It hurts to let go of the reigns; although, I can't say that I have held them, ever so tightly. Still, it hurts. They don't need my advice. If I could do it again, I would have held her tighter, I would have sung more sweetly into her ears, at nap time, I would have gone fishing and I would never have yelled, just spanked more. Oh well, hind sight, as they say...
They really don't want me to tell them anything at all. I could get offended and run away, in my mind. I have to ride the waves of emotions and not get discouraged, when I fall off.
Morning guilds the skies and I am grateful that she missed the bus this morning, so I can be introduced to this precious child who jumped on the beds everywhere, decorated the walls of everywhere we lived and spinned and flipped all over the world with us and now is a stallwart, strong, ambitious woman. Birthday is coming and I am grateful that God spared my life this long, to see her grown.
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